Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I picked this book up in May (2019) after experiencing one of the most difficult life changes of my entire life this April. I wasn't really sure what to expect from this and I wasn't completely ready to pick it up when I first bought it. But I've already taken a lot more steps since the beginning of May into June and I finally felt it was time too figure out what it means to resist being happy.
Summary
A true story about why we sabotage ourselves, feel overwhelmed, set aside our dreams, and lack the courage to simply be ourselves... and how to start choosing happiness again! Are you happy? It may be the wrong question. Most of us think we are relatively happy, while at the same time knowing that we could be happier -- maybe even a lot happier. Ordinary people and the finest philosophers have been exploring the question of happiness for thousands of years, and theories abound. But this is not a book of theory. Resisting Happiness is a deeply personal, disarmingly transparent look at why we sabotage our own happiness and what to do about it. Are you overwhelmed? Do you procrastinate? Do you sometimes feel like you are your own worst enemy?
The revelation this book made me have was not the one I was expecting before I even picked it up. I was expecting this book to heal me, to be the bandage to cover the wounds I don't want to look at anymore. But it wasn't my bandage, it was the removal of the bandage I had put on my own wounds. It made me realize that I have to be the one to heal my own wounds, or I can resist and let them sit open and prone to my own mental infection. (Just to clarify, I don't have any physical wounds!). This book made me aware of the constant resistance in my daily life and I tried to look back to see when that resistance started but I cannot come up with even a general point in time; it has simply been there as long as I can remember. Which makes me feel horrible as a person but it makes me feel better to know that I've realized this at nineteen years old. As described in the book, some people don't realize this until they are near death and can do only little, if anything, to change how resistance affects them. Even after reading this and realizing that I am the only one capable of starting the process of my healing, I don't feel completely ready to start that process because part of me is still hurting. But that could very easily be resistance, letting me wallow in the pit of my own sadness. My resistance has a lot to do with my thoughts and mental health and sometimes it is hard for me to combat them, but I am going to start to try harder to fight the things holding me back. This book taught me that resistance has a thousand different faces and I took a second after reading that line to reflect on the many different faces resistance has taken throughout my life and there were way more than I realized. This book taught me a lot of things, but it has, most importantly, given me the knowledge that resistance exists and now that I know that I feel more prepared to begin my journey to combat it.
This book also made me realize that I haven't had a very direct relationship with God. This may not be important to some people and I completely understand because every person believes different things. This book didn't simply show me that I had been lacking in continuing to build my relationship with God but it made me want to start building it again. I am not the most religious person; I went to church when I was little but sports got in the way as I got older and since then I haven't really built my own relationship with God, my own way without someone forcing me. I do believe in God and have my entire life but this book ushered me towards the fact that I want a better relationship with God than the one I currently have and that I am going to have to push through my own resistance to have one.
Overall, this book really made me think and I enjoy books that make me question myself, my thoughts and my life. This book was the first book I can remember doing that for me. It was always hold a significant value to me and I hope that I can take the knowledge I've learned and apply it to my life.
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